Now cut to today, when just a few hours prior to this post my mother returns home from the afforementioned celebrations and hands me a copy of their annual. Now, not being one to turn down a good read-especially if the paper is glossy-I begin to peruse the magazine:-
"Ah look, a Bos Burger ad", "Oooh the amphitheatre sure looks nice", "Awww, look at the cute children", "Hey I know that guy he goes to my school. Hmm, it says here he's Paragon of Society and all youths in the country should seek to emulate him"..."DOUBLE YOU TEE EFF!!!!"
That was just a brief description of what went on in my head (minus several expletives).
In the article this dude-whom I will hitherto refer to as 'H'-is described as "An Illuminate of St. James" (a title which I strongly believe he himself chose). Now, the article begins innocently enough speaking of his deceased father who was apparently a stalwart citizen renowned for his contributions to the community and even honoured by We Beat much like his dear progeny. That's fine with me. It is after those initial paragraphs however that things start giving me a sour taste in the back of my mouth which, by the end, leaves me with a full blown ulcer!!! But I'm getting ahead of myself here.
The bullcrap begins when the misguided interviewer describes him as "humble", "generous" and "modest". Let's start at the top: 'Humble' though he may appear he's more of the type that likes to reveal his possessions as an aside; surreptitiously revealing said possessions in light conversation. 'Generous' is a whopper!!! The only thing I have known him to give freely was his knowledge-which is very very generous of him indeed but it's always out of interest in his own needs than out of true altruism-and even with that he saves his most precious knowledge for himself. As for his 'modesty', see last two sentences and do the math.
The body of the article outlines his numerous qualifications; ranging from his sporting achievements (an illustrious career as a B-squad football team benchwarmer), his stints as a university lecturer (on the topic of Indo-asian diaspora [the equivalent of a glorified history teacher that specializes in only one culture]), his certificates in the fields of I.T. at the ages of 7 and 8 respectively (the nature of which strikes me as very, VERY dubious) and his amazing decline of entrance into M.I.T. in order to opt for more local matriculation so that he can be near to his dear dear mother (whom I have on very reliable hearsay is not treated very well by him <_<...>_>). Now at this point i wasa thinking:"Justin, calm down it's just a little embelishing on his part. It's very human and very understandable."
Then I read the next sentence.
It read, AND I QUOTE:-
Amazinng it is to delve deep into a mind for which perception is at an evolution of contradiction yet a forum of comprehension. As he said, "A vicious vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, it may even be seen as a voracious violation yet a more simplistic definitive version will always hold firm to the minds of those who adhere to the concept of the notion which in the first place was the point of this violation." with which he went on to explain to me a concept of being a leader or of being opinionated and decisive.
V for Vendetta anyone!? Though, in his defense, I will say V's introductory speech has been significantly altered and I suppose he can indeed pass that off as his own words. However, it is absolutely impossible for me to convey the somewhat veiled veneers of his viciously voluptuous voracity for vindication and his vitriol that lies hidden in vignettes that pose verisimiltudes that victoriously make vegetables of virtuous and vapid people. It's enough to drive one Virtually Insane!
